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March 19, 2008

Alright, I have been seriously lacking in the blog department lately.  Honestly, I didn’t think anyone noticed.  I’ve heard from a few people though wanting to know how we’re doing, so I guess it’s time to update. 

For those of you that know us, you know that our family is involved in our church’s production of a passion play every year.  This year was no different and we just finished up on Sunday.  WOW.  With Easter so much earlier this year it was TIME and labor intensive to get it all pulled together.  It was fun though and Andrew and I truly LOVE doing it.  I’m not sure what next year holds or if both of us will be able to be involved, but it was nice to squeeze out another year.

Christopher finished up his first attempt at standardized testing two weeks ago.  I have no clue how he did, but we should get those results in June.  I told him that it was more of a test on how well I’m teaching him and not a test on how well he’s learning, but at same time I’d like to know that he is learning.  HA! 

Erin’s moving right along on growing up.  She’ll be thrilled when next fall rolls around and she’s ‘officially’ in school.  For now, we work when Christopher staying on pace because I know I don’t have to do anything official with her.  I think she would rather we did it more often though so I’m trying to keep her busy with things.

Sean’s doing a fair amount of staying out of trouble lately.  Of course, he might just be getting better at hiding it, but overall I think he’s doing better.

Kelsie’s 4 months old now.  How did that happen??  She is absolutely precious and I can’t get enough of her smiles and cuddles. 

Well, Christopher has finished his math and is ready for history. 

In Him,
Michele

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One Comment leave one →
  1. Anonymous permalink
    March 19, 2008 1:13 pm

    I just found your blog today (a link from another blogger). Your heart does sound heavy with burdens and I feel for you! You're not in any way unique with the overwhelming and disappointing life you describe, or with the personal challenge (gossiping), so don't beat yourself up! However, you do sound a bit burned out and tired of it all- the kid struggles, the expectations on yourself, the losing battle of hope in your dreams of homesteading. This is also shared with others. (NOT that that is a comfort).
    BUT, since I have been there (and currently hold onto many of my own hopes -AND FAITH- tenuously, for the same kinds of reasons), I wanted to encourage you with a few suggestions, and hopefully encourage you to stick around here with all the others of us in pursuit of homesteading dreams, because your journey to get there is as big an inspiration to others of us as are those who have already attained their plot and animals, et al.
    First tho', I think it would help to get some additional support with the caretaking you're doing for the kids. because it sounds like your energy is waning, your mind and spirit may need revitalizing before you can take any positive steps toward actualizing your dreams. Certainly there are other moms here (virtually) and around you (physically) that can offer more ideas than I can on this. Perhaps respite care thru your County agencies, or church interaction to provide some relief on your behalf, are all I can think of. But once you've rested up, and gotten the household in hand, then you can implement some small steps that will increase the vitality of your spirits- perhaps container gardening, or bringing home a small flock of chickens… perhaps beginning quilting and canning and food drying/preserving – and meantime, perhaps incorporate something TANGIBLE right away, like wearing a special apron while you research and learn will give you a sense of purpose to hold on to. (I bet the kids would like their own, too- while making seed tape or watering and sprouting seeds or something- anything from milk cartens to old tires make great garden containers that a kid can handle taking care of, just think outside the box and keep your eyes open to opportunities.)
    One more thought, tho' you may need a refreshed mind for this also- but when it comes to any personal challenges like the gossiping that you spoke of – it might do you well to recreate the circumstances in your mind where you became trapped in those conversations and lost your guard – then coming up with 3 or 4 scenarios where you said the right thing- the right response that stopped the process. Once, I was in this situation where I realized what we were doing, I actually giggled a bit and said "Oh no! We're gossiping!" and my friend said "Oh you're right, we were!" and we were able to move on to something else without any humiliation or anything. I think the other ladies that are in on such talk would have a personality disorder if they were to continue doing it once the actual word "gossiping" is attributed to it, don't you?
    Remember, don't beat yourself up, these challenges in our lives are "allowed" in order for us to grow stronger, and to learn to lean on Him and each other!
    I hope to read more of your homesteading journey soon.
    -Illoura

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